The heavy rains continued to pour as she stood by the large narra tree, her left hand holding up a red umbrella, the other clutching her raincoat closer to her shivering form. Despite the foul weather, a hint of a glum smile began tugging at the edge of her lips.
She tossed the red umbrella aside as she took a tentative step forward. Even with the translucent veil of raindrops, she knew where she was going. She made her way across the field, her feet never breaking a practiced rhythm, never missing a beat.
Young and full of running
Tell me where has that taken me?
Just a great figure eight or a tiny infinity?
It was one of those lazy days. She was staring at the soccer field, wondering how it managed to stay as green as it was despite the scorching sun. Or at least, that was what she told herself she was doing. He was conveniently seated by the window overlooking the field, back hunched over a pile of papers, and lips pursed in concentration.
Soccer field. She was looking at the soccer field.
With one last gaze, she sighed.
Tomorrow, she said. It was always tomorrow.
Love is really nothing
But a dream that keeps waking me,
Her hands were shaking as she reached for the door, partly from the cold, and partly from the darkness that embraced the atmosphere.
It had been quite some time since she’d been here, but everything was the same. The jarring familiarity buckled her knees, sending her kneeling in the middle of what was once her sanctuary. Their sanctuary.
For all of my trying, we still end up dying
How can it be?
They were polar opposites; that was pretty apparent. There were days that they’d argue to no end. It was about everything and nothing at the same time.
The more they humor each other, the more she fell.
The more she knew the crash would hurt.
Don’t say a word, just come over and lie here with me
‘Cause I’m just about to set fire to everything I see
Trust me, he said—and she did— so much it scared her, thrilled her, sent her to a roller coaster of emotions, some she even had no name for.
The rain pounded harder and faster but his words echoed loud and clear across the cottage. Her knees were numb from kneeling, but her heart was not. Hot, salty tears rolled from her eyes, across her cheeks, her lips, finally dropping onto the floor.
It was two months of bliss. Two months of a well constructed façade.
I want you so bad; I’ll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it; I’m scared you’ll forget about me
They say that drunken words are sober thoughts.
Four shots of tequila later, she was heading towards him, false bravado in hand. One kiss was what she needed. One kiss to purge him out of her system.
She was ready for his rejection.
She needed him to say it.
She needed him to push her away.
She wasn’t prepared for him to reciprocate.
So young and full of running
All the way to the edge of desire
Steady my breathing, silently screaming
I have to have you now
